Welcome to the McAvoy Layne impersonator column
McAvoy Layne is a good impersonator of my pen name except for the lack of humor, wit and satire. His attempts at writing the Pine Nuts columns that are mistakenly placed as Opinions rather than under his own column that should be named Lame Layne's attempts at both humor and wit. Though I do acknowledge his status as the Official Mark Twain impersonator Nit Wit.
However, it is not Layne's fault that his rhetorical writings end up as Opinions expressed as Pine Nuts (or Just Plain Nuts by his detractors). At least Hal Holbrook tried to stay on script from my writings rather than use me as a ventriloquist ghost dummy. Holbrook spent 57 years impersonating me which is longer than I impersonated Mark Twain. Hal did a fair job but was afraid of applying my politically incorrect satire as does Lame Nuts Layne. Layne carries an unlit cigar as a prop which he replaces about as often as his wig.
The fault dear brutalized reader lies with the editor and publisher of Carson Now who evidently does not know the difference between a columnist and an opinion section of the News paper business that should be re-titled as OP-ED section defined as:
"Today, the OP-ED term is used more widely to represent a column that represents the strong, informed, and focused opinion of the writer on an issue of relevance to a targeted audience. It is a written prose piece which expresses the opinion of an author or entity with no affiliation with the publication's editorial board."
Advise all my impersonators to at least try to resemble my appearance and to stay on script based on my writings instead of writing their words using my name. Give Lame Nuts Layne his own column instead of allowing him to bury any and all other opinions that transcend his own pathetic daily dear diary entries which I personally find as trivial and boring as a bad experience. "Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions" (such as using an Opinion section for a dear diary chronicle of Lame Nuts Layne).
Signed the ghost of Samuel Langhorne Clemens a.k.a Mark Twain