Opinion

There are only a handful of counties in America with only one township, and Nevada’s Churchill County is one of them. So I was honored to be invited to speak as Mark Twain at this year’s Lincoln Day Dinner at the Fallon Convention Center, hosted by the Churchill County Republican Central Committee.

Jimmy was a friend of mine. He was blind, but often saw more than I did. He was nine when he walked up to my lifeguard stand, introduced himself, and asked me to teach him how to swim. I taught him how to swim and he taught me how to see.

As Mark Twain tells us, “It’s the little things that smoothes people’s roads out the most.” And so it happened back in 1966 on a hellish afternoon in a Vietnam village, that a Montagnard woman handed a Marine a cube of ice.

On February 24, 2022, I grumbled because I had to pay $3.659/per gallon to fill my fuel tank in my pickup, then on March 2nd, I was even more disgusted at having to pay $3.749/per gallon to top fill up again. Now today, March 4th, - just 2 days later - I am angry that the price of fuel has jumped more to more than $4.799 for fuel.

Army Ants know all about aggression. They think they invented aggression, and they will do it all day long for the queen. Sound familiar? Here’s how they wage their wars; first they bivouac, that is to say, they build a living nest with their bodies within a tree trunk or hole in the ground. Don’t ask me how they do that. Once they are organized into a big ball, the soldier ants, those with the big mandibles, patrol the surface of the bivouac and fight off aggressors.

Should censorship of Nevadas possible gubernatorial candidates be allowed? If one believes in our democracy then the answer is a clear NO. The beauty of our voting system is WE THE PEOPLE have the opportunity to hear out potential candidates, and thier positions before we choose who we want to represent us in the primaries later this year.

In Russia’s managed democracy of this 21st century, sometimes, though not often, an underdog candidate will actually win an election. It’s rare as hens’ teeth, but it happened a couple years ago in the tiny village of Povalikhino.

The two finalists for the Superintendent hire will be interviewed by the School Board on February 22nd at 8:15am. Robert Crowell Board Room, Community Center, 851 E William Street, Carson City.

We have long known that fish can navigate. Who among us has not visited Taylor Creek and stood in awe while witnessing the amazing annual salmon run? But can a fish navigate on land, drive a car? Come to find out, the answer is a resounding, “Yes!”

Fear of war begets war as both sides arm-up to pre-empt an attack by the other, and so we find ourselves today fearing yet another self-imposed escalation. With thousands of troops stationed on Ukraine’s border, Russia is telling Ukraine, “If you continue to court NATO we will take whatever action necessary to stop the expansion of NATO.

With the Olympic Games upon us, I feel compelled to confess, in full, to a lapse of moral judgement that long ago cost yours truly an Olympic berth. This true confession comes with a caveat to young athletes who aspire to compete in the Games, “Don’t do as I did."

Dear parents, grandparents and concerned residents,

Carson City School Board Trustees will be deciding on the top 1 or 2 candidates to be interviewed on February 22, 2022 and February 23, 2022, if needed, to fill the Carson City School Superintendent vacancy.

This meeting will be held at the Robert Crowell Board Room, Community Center, 851 E William Street, at 5:30pm on February 2nd, 2022.

The Slaughterhouse issue goes before the Board of Supervisors (BOS) on Thursday, February 3, at 5pm.
The “Downtown 2020 Group”, the City, and other Organizations have worked hard to improve our downtown corridor to recruit businesses, tourism and make it a gathering place for our locals.

This is an open letter to Governor Sisolak, the Board of Prison Commissioners, the Director Nevada Department of Corrections and the general public of Nevada.

Nobility of character has fallen out of favor with us Americans. Our founding fathers had it, though they neglected to document the possession of it as an essential ingredient for election to office.

Time, to my mind, is merely music, if we can only hear it. It occurs to me that our lives are not played out over time, but are played out over melodies and harmonies that compose a swaying samba for instance, that might mature into a beautiful symphony.

For folk who might actually give two little Rat's Fannies about looking out for other folk so they wear a mask, I was not surprised but disappointed when I encountered one of Carson City's BOS members not wearing a mask today at Home Depot.

When I commented to the pony-tailed individual that there was a mask mandate he was less than enthusiastic.

I advised that he might want to lead by example...yeah, like that's gonna happen.

This article/petition is set in motion to Stop all Discriminatory policies in the State of Nevada being imposed on Government/State Employees based on COVID “vaccination status.”

https://www.change.org/ProtectNVstateworkers

The Nevada Governors Office is planning to implement weekly Covid testing this month along with a $55 surcharge for all State employees starting in July who don’t meet the definition of “fully vaccinated.”

I believe Antonio Brown is consciously doing the things he’s doing and should be held accountable no question…. but he has CTE in all likelihood. This has unfortunately aided in his antics off (and now on) the field. No, Antonio Brown should not be given another chance in the NFL (but most likely will) because of his antics. Instead, he should be focused on his brain and mental well-being.

Dateline Saudi Arabia, where 40 Botox enhanced camels were recently disqualified from a beauty contest. Personally, I feel sorry for those camels, as I had a personal experience with Botox myself that I’m almost too embarrassed to talk about.

This is the hardiest lot in the country today. They are the whole-hearted few that see winter through up on the Comstock Lode, the squirrels that wear dusters. They make their money in the summer, then squirrel it away to see them through a cold Comstock winter.

As we all know, preparation for war begets war, and Russia, with 100,000 troops camping on the Ukrainian border, has taken an increasingly bellicose stand. But wait! E-Sports might come to the rescue.

The Slaughterhouse goes back to the Planning Commission on Wednesday, December 15, at the Community Center in the Bob Crowell room. It starts at 3pm, but the slaughterhouse's application most likely will not be reviewed until 5p.m. or later, depending on how much time other agenda items take. You are all welcome to attend.

"Dinner on the patio? First, hold the stench" by Scott McFetridge Ass. Press Des Moines, Iowa, is the article that was posted in the Reno Gazette-Journal | Thursday, 25 November 2021, Page A11 –
Click on the link below to read this amazing story.

People sometimes ask me when I’m pretending to be Mark Twain, “Is there any humor to be found in the Bible?” “Yes,” I answer, with a little sugar in my voice. “There is humor to be found in the Bible, especially at Christmas, when we need it most. You see, there exists a street in Damascus, even today, that goes by the name of, are you sitting down? Goes by the name of, 'Straight.'"

Dateline Canada, where today’s most industrious landscape architects are the world’s busiest beavers. Having been an Oregon Duck fan all my life, I really don’t buy much stock in them buck-toothed beavers, though I do have a soft spot in my heart for the beavers of Canada.

Since 1989 lucky turkeys have had their necks ceremoniously saved each Thanksgiving by presidential pardon.

Modern-day presidents generally take the credit for this feel-good symbolism; but the real hero for these fortunate gobblers is a little boy named Thomas, whose influence over his father resulted in what would later become a national tradition.

I’m not a numbers person, but sometimes numbers add up in such a way as to make an impression, and now that I’m slightly older than Smokey Bear, I figure I’d better start doing something socially redeemable before it’s too late.

A friend of mine, and popular columnist, whose name shall be kept a secret to protect the innocent, but rhymes with Pat Hickey, asked me yesterday if I believed in a life beyond. I felt like Jack Benny when confronted by a robber who demanded, “Your money or your life!”

So, please help me if you can. What in tarnation is a Bitcoin, anyways? To my mind, a day’s work has always earned an American dollar, a Russian ruble or a French franc. I understand coins are disappearing as they aren’t worth much anymore, but what is a Bitcoin, and what’s it worth? I posed this question to a savvy friend of mine and he shrugged his shoulders and said, “sixty-six thousand?”

I, Jim Shirk spoke at that the Board of Supervisors meeting October 21st, this is I said -
about Clinton/Slaughterhouse/Bagwell