By Diane Dye Hansen

What was your reaction to that headline? Was it a silent nodding of the head? Did you bristle — “not me!” Did you analyze? “All of us — really, Diane.” Did you get angry? “What is this clickbait?” No matter your reaction, there are a few universal truths we all deal with differently. Fear is real. Fear manifests in different ways. Fear shows up in all of us at one time or another. Terror is when fear stops us from doing what we want to do.

How do we prevent fear from becoming terror?

We take action — of some sort. Fight or flight is action. I’d like to propose another F. Fidelity.

Oxford dictionary definition of fidelity I am talking about here.

fi·del·i·ty – /fəˈdelədē/ (noun) 1. faithfulness to a person, cause, or belief, demonstrated by continuing loyalty and support.

Have you ever heard the phrase you can’t be in fear and love at the same time? That’s fidelity. When you are fully committed to staring down fear and moving through it (not around or past it — avoidance), you demonstrate the fidelity that will leverage your fear, prevent it from becoming terror, and transform it into learning.

This is a column of how, though, not just theory. Here are some practical ways you can accomplish this, no matter what is terrifying you right now.

— Recognize what you fear. By giving it a name, you separate the fear from yourself and start to remove the ego piece from the fear. (I’m not enough because of this or I’m too good for this)

— Courageously question what it is about that you fear. Ask any question but WHY. What is it about “why” that makes it a no-go? “Why” will drive you into the story of the fear. You will relive the fear. If you can keep yourself from reliving, you can grow through the fear.

— Become your own devil’s advocate. Why SHOULDN’T you fear it? If you can’t get there. Ask people who don’t fear it WHAT about it isn’t fearful to them. This will help you get to the reward of fidelity.

— Make a plan to address the fear. Sit down and give yourself no more than two things you will do to address your fear. Studies have proven the more goals you have, the less likely you are to accomplish all of them. Tackle one or two intentionally, though, and you will have the focus you need for your plan to succeed.

— Take regular action. Actually DO IT. Those who know me know I have a fear of being encased in water. One year, I booked a trip to Lotus, CA and I went white water rafting. I realized this fear had been holding me back. Step 1: Find a GroupOn and buy it. Step 2: Show up. That was it. That was my plan. Plans do not need to be complicated.

— Recognize your progress and praise yourself. Continuous praise is important. Fear is not easy to work through. It might take several plans. Progress = praise. By dropping the self-talk of “but I’m not there yet” you will empower yourself to get there.

Those of you who read this column for business communication insight might wonder what this has to do with your business. It has EVERYTHING to do with your business. Terror stops revenue in its tracks. It halts innovation. It prevents the pitch. It stops the sale just before it’s about to close.

Where does this resonate with you? The floor is yours, Carson City.

GET MOMENTUM EVERY MONDAY
I’m back at Adams Hub for Innovation every Monday from 10 am until 2 pm offering FREE help to the community. You can schedule time with me in 30 minute or one-hour increments to help you get momentum with any aspect of business: strategy, process, tactics, communications, or accountability. Email me at diane@whatworksconsultants.com to schedule time with me.

ABOUT DIANE DYE HANSEN
Diane Dye Hansen has more than 20 years of experience in communication and change management gained in the sectors of government, non-profit, healthcare, publishing, advertising, entertainment, and technology. Her Critical Opportunity Theory helps organizations and leaders turn challenge into opportunity through proper leadership and team communication.
She is the president and founder of What Works Consultants, Inc., a consulting firm which helps business leaders communicate when communication is hard. This is done through research, strategic communication planning, change management consulting, human resources recruitment and training. She is a columnist on CarsonNow.org. To meet her and learn how she and her team can help your company, visit What Works Consultants, Inc. online at www.whatworksconsultants.com.